Date Debate: Foreplay (Pt.4)

NOTE: For mature audiences ONLY...

I have to admit the only thing I enjoy more than cuddling is foreplay, simple because if cuddling can be an all day activity, then foreplay could last a week ( I hear a universal groan-LMAO). The thing about foreplay is some women are able to benefit much more from the experience. Most women use it as a awaking of the sleeping beast (the vulva), building the sensations and causing arousal, but others can get so much more pleasure from it, some can orgasm from the experience in general. For the lucky ones, nipple stimulation and fingering can cause orgasmic delight where some need the next step, oral gratification and beyond that penetration, vaginal or anal.

The reason I appreciate foreplay is, when done right, it can take hours, even the day; it’s the exploration of not only yourself but also your partner. We all have different experiences and we all appreciate different things and sometimes it takes that someone new to introduce us to something we weren’t aware of, when it comes to our own bodies. Maybe it’s their technique, or touch or the connection they have with us that sends different responses through our body. Foreplay doesn’t start with direct contact to the sex organs; it most often begins with touch and massage. The arms, back, head, stomach, legs, it the connection of your body parts with their body parts. You throw your leg over theirs, slide in closer (CUDDLE) hug, then the kissing begins, soft and sensual, rough and hurried. On the neck, the chin, the cheek, the mouth, the neck.

Foreplay is about finding the sensitive spots, the ticklish areas that cause laughter as well as sensual pleasures. Sometimes we think sexual pleasure should only cause one reaction, but laughter, crying or any burst of pleasurable emotion is good. It’s about learning to relax with your partner. Feeling their hands on you, while their leg is sliding up against yours, all the while you’re kissing. It’s heightening every sensor in your body able to feel the touch against your skin, but your tongue, tasting their skin, their lips, even the feel and taste of their tongue against your own. How parts of your partners body feels to you, as well as, how your touch and taste pleases them and awakens their sexuality.

The purpose of foreplay no matter how people feel about it, whither they wish to engage in it or not, for how long they wish to participate, the fact is foreplay is meant to awaken your erogenous zones. My best description would be the areas, which aren’t necessarily the sexual organs, but spots on the body like the lower back, the ear, neck, inner thigh that open up the desire for pleasure. Causing just as much desire as massaging the head of the penis or direct stimulation to the clitoris. Foreplay isn’t always necessary and there are levels of what’s incorporated into foreplay, such as oral sex and taint play but for me that’s too easy to use. The desire to awaken your partner’s body and cause them to do new and deliberate things is the fun part. I prefer to spend the time, to make my partners body my playground. In general society gender roles us into backing away from expressions of play with the male body (sorry guys many of you haven’t gotten the attention you deserve), we far to often ignore the most pleasurable parts of his body, such as his nipples.

We don’t often incorporate touching, licking, biting and stroking in the way that can really benefit him. Also remember for both a woman and a man, breathing, moaning and moving the air like in yoga during foreplay can be an enhancement to the pleasure you are getting and giving. Recall that everyone is different some people maybe very visual while others are very auditory so making noise heightens the experience for both males and females regardless of whom your partner is. Be open to trying new things with one another. Lay in bed and just stroke each other, touch, hold, feel the warmth your body creates in certain areas, watch it, look at it, this is great on so many levels because you can at the same time be looking for signs of an STI (Sexually Transmitted Infection- Safety FIRST!) or you could find that by tracing his penis the different pressures he likes, the grip he enjoys and see if ur able to make his dick jump involuntarily. You can kiss it, lick it, and vise versa for her. This can lead back to kissing or it can lead into more play with hands and fingers, some may try to bring a woman to climax at this time while actively engaging her in stimulating nipple play. Massaging the back of the head and neck while receiving nipple stimulation can be enhanced by pressing lightly on their head, playing with their ears, even doing hand on hand finger play between her legs or stroking his cock.

Foreplay should engage and excite your partner, if it’s not working for either of you than you need to try something new, no point in drawing attention to aspects that don’t turn either of you on. Be aware of your roles are you a giver while your partner s a receiver are you balanced on the giving/ receiving scale, being of aware of this can guarantee you both fully get you needs meet prior to acts of intercourse. The acts and aspects of foreplay are also great in allowing you to recognize and be open with your sexuality, what you like, how far your willing to go, what will be your next steps for you and your partner. You may find they are very selfish, or they don’t turn you on. They allow you to get to know your bedroom behavior, what you like and where you like it most. Are you a yes man, a no girl, are you the one who never curses in public but can throw expletives like a biker in a drunken brawl at a bar at the height of pleasure. Are you a screamer, moaner, a heathen who only calls on the lord when you’ve been laid on hands? Foreplay may not be this exciting or inviting to you, but if you allow yourself to RELAX and be OPEN, and enjoy, but be able to command what you want, need, like and enjoy but really gets your rocks off.

The goal is a great orgasm the enjoyment is the journey getting there. Foreplay now, Foreplay forever!